4-22-13 -- Vietnam, Psycho Motorbikes, Street Food and Monkeys!

Vietnam's hectic pace of life hit me like a ton of bricks as soon as I stepped out of the airport. Gone were the easy English-only conversations from HK, and I found myself immediately thrown into a world of new pricing and haggling. My first stop was to grab a new unlimited-data sim card for my phone. I've found that having my smartphone fired up and on my hip at all times makes traveling life SO much easier. Maps, web access, translations, photos, currency calculators, all at my fingertips. How did people travel before this phenomenal tech was available? A quick calculation of the currency exchange to the Vietnamese Dong confirmed my great aspiration - I am now a multi-multi-multi millionaire. Millions of Dong poured out of the ATM machine like all so much Monopoly money. The common, large denomination bill that comes out of ATM machines is an astonishing 500,000 Dong (in one bill!). Unfortunately this equates to only about $25 USD, but it's still fun.

I split a cab with a sweet Aussie couple to 'Old Town' Hanoi - roughly a 30 minute drive. Gone are the orderly street rules of Hong Hong, giving way to a sort of mad-dash of scooters, cabs, and trucks. There seem to be few driving rules here besides 'don't hit anyone.' Cheap scooters zip this way and that through the darkness, many running backwards down the freeway margin. The cabbie nonchalantly taps his reciprocating horn every few seconds, giving off an echoey 'Waaaaaa Wa Waaa Wa waaa wa wa.' I've never heard anything like it, but I suppose this type of horn differentiates large vehicles from the small mopeds - generally indicating "get out of the way!" Most of the bikes are so small that they are scarcely able to manage a meager 60 kph pace on a major freeway. This however does not stop them from being the predominant form of transit on the road!

As we approached downtown on this warm, Friday night, I began to notice the huge crowds of people casually sitting about on the streets and sidewalks. I'm not talking about one crowd, i'm talking every street, every square inch FILLED with thousands of people eating, drinking, laughing, playing on the street. Most sit on small (think kindergarden-sized) pink or blue plastic seats with equally tiny tables placed between them. Delightful smells of cooking meat and food fill the cab with a tummy-rumbling aroma. I find myself in that fun half-excited, half-paralyzed state of being thrown into a new and unfamiliar environment. The cab driver speaks no english, and appears to be actively ignoring my request to speak to him as he chatters away on his cell phone. Relieved, I pull my security-blanket cellphone out of my pocket and am able to confirm that he is taking us on a long route around a dense street closure for a night market. I realize that he has only the best intentions, and very much wanted to make sure that he dropped me smack-dab at the door to my hotel. Very sweet.

Mobile Mango Magnate

I stepped out of the cab, and into the buzzing nightlife of Old Town Hanoi. I felt immediately conspicuous with my large backpack, but made do. After a minute or so analysis of the ceaseless scooter traffic, I realized that in order to cross the street I must simply step into the fray. My concerns of death and destruction in a bloody pedestrian accident were quickly alleviated as I watched the traffic smoothly detour around my body - like a river flowing around a large boulder. Nobody yelled, nobody honked, everybody went on there way. Awesome! I quickly checked into my $9 hotel, and hit the night market.

I've spend the last couple days mostly walking around, exploring the never-ending diverse options of owner-run storefronts, and street food. Amidst the chaos, the city seems to be neatly organized by vendor - there's a street for hardware stores (where you'll find more than 20 competing vendors), a street for metal-work, a street for decorative lanterns, a street for children's toys, and so on. I'm not sure how or if it was all laid out, but once you learn how it works its quite charming! On day two of wandering I ran into a wonderful young man named Josh - I was quickly comforted by his exceptional English skills, and we ended up chatting for quite a while at his shop. Turns out he's just as busy as everyone else in this wild town, wheremhe works three jobs simultaneously! Besides his couture shop, he teaches English to locals, and Vietnamese to expats and businesspeople. On the side he designs clothing, and got accepted to a great school in the UK. All his busy activities make me feel a bit like a layabout just bumming around town. :-) Either way he somehow has quite a bit of time available to hang out. We've been mobbing around town on his Honda 110 motorbike. "It's NOT a scooter" he said pointing to a Vespa nearby "Thats a scooter!" "Mine has gears!" He's a sweet guy. :-)

Josh on his Honda 110

I was delighted to have Josh's native Vietnamese skills to get me into the difficult-to-order street food of Hanoi, of which there is a LOT! Josh has grown up in this town since he was a boy, and therefore knows every little nook and cranny of the city. We've dabbled in delicious home-made pho, charcoal-cooked vietnamese sandwiches, BBQ-it-yourself beef and 'goat teat,' deep fried sweet potato and shrimp cakes. The food is diverse, colorful, aromatic and absolutely delightful on the tongue. If funny to remember that all this culinary exuberance happens on the street on TINY chairs and tables. My over-sized American frame just barely fits, and and I look comically oversized almost everywhere I eat. The locals seem to find it amusing in a sweet sort of way, chuckling and smiling, while trying to pull chairs further out to be accommodating. This morning's Pho-noodle breakfast was particularly amusing, as I had to share a bench seat with a 10 year old Vietnamese girl who could not have been more than 4 feet tall. She had to reach WAY out from the chair to reach the table, while I hunched over looking like Quazimoto munching on a bowl of noodles. It's all very fun!

Yummy Street Food -
Cook-it-Yourself Beef and Goat Teat

A big thank you to Josh! I could not have had this deep and meaningful interaction with the people, food and culture of Hanoi if I had not run into him - thanks Josh!

I've started casually scoping out the motorcycle scene in Vietnam, and i'm realizing that this trip is going to be lets say…… different than I expected. The country's two-wheeled offerings are dominated by small-displacement scooters and motorbikes, very few of which are larger than 150cc's. For those of you not familiar with motorcycles - think VERY small San Francisco runabout scooter. If you ask for a "BIG Bike," most shop owners eye's light up as they guide you it the back room and show you their crown-jewel: it's usually a 250cc Honda or Suzuki dual sport. This is a respectable bike, high quality and fun in all respects, but still it's no freeway capable machine. My Suzuki VSTROM back home is considered a 'medium' sized bike, and it has a whopping 650cc motor - something almost unheard of in Vietnam. Disappointed, but not dismayed I went back to my hotel to do a bit more research. It turns out that until 2007 Vietnam had a ban on any motorbike larger than 175cc's. This restriction was loosened in 2008, but only by applying a near 100% import tax on larger-displacement bikes. That means a bike that would cost $10k USD new in the states would cost an astounding $20k USD in Vietnam. It's no surprise that the second-hand market is pretty sparse, as few people want make that large of an investment in importing a bike.

Monster Ficus Tree in the
Hanoi Botanical Garden

With this newfound knowledge I have two options - stay here in Hanoi and buy a 250cc bike at a steep markup, or fly to Thailand and get the bike I really want and continue the tour from there. There's benefits on both sides: A smaller bike would be easier to man-handle up the notoriously rough, muddy roads of Vietnam. Local, small bikes also have more parts available in rural areas, and locals know how to work on them. But a larger bike from Thailand would be FAST, fun and more capable for cross-continent touring. I haven't made up my mind just yet. In the mean time I think I'm going to sign up for a 5 day guided motorbike tour of Northern Vietnam through a local agency. They provide the bike, guide, route and lodging. All I have to do is show up and ride! If anything breaks, they know how to fix it. I think this is probably the best introduction to riding in a foreign country - it'll give me the opportunity to learn about licenses, registration, fuel, maintenance, road quality etc, all while under the watchful eye of a seasoned pro. Believe it or not a 5-day supported tour costs only $250 USD. I LOVE this country!